How To Dress Sexy And Not Trashy

“If you got it, flaunt it, boy I know you want it …”

People always ask why I’m so quick to throw on a ‘freakum dress’. The truth is, I just love the way my body looks in them!

I’ve learned over the years there’s a huge difference in dressing sexy versus dressing trashy. I’m talking Jada Pinkett-Smith, Tracee Ellis-Ross, grown-woman-sexy. I have a few rules I apply when dressing sexy, I wanted to share them with you so that you can implement them into your closet.

Find Your Confidence. Nothing’s more annoying than an insecure girl in a tight dress. So if you’re going to wear that sexy little number, you better OWN IT honey. That means quit tugging at your skirt rising, or pulling up your low cleavage, because you clearly bought the wrong size if you have to keep adjusting it. Go confidently in your look. The sexy outfit is only half of the statement, the way you look and feel in it is what truly matters.

Find Balance. My rule of thumb in dressing sexy and not trashy is to choose a focus. Everything should not hang out! If you’re going to wear your midsection out, then consider covering your thighs with pants or a midi dress/skirt. If you’re thighs or legs will be out, cover up your top. You tend to look a little ‘Snooky-Jersey-Shore’ trashy if you wear your stomach, thighs, and cleavage out at the same time. It can be overwhelming to say the least. So find a focus and balance everything you wear around that.

*Style Tip – If you’re a pear shape like me with wide hips and a small waist, focus on your small waist. When I’m feeling sexy I always go for a crop top. I focus on my waist being exposed and I usually cover my thighs for balance.

Accessorize. This may be my second favorite way to dress up my sex appeal. Accessories take you a long way. Those elongated earrings always makes me feel like a hottie; especially if I’m wearing a basic dress. A sultry lip can easy dress up your look. And let’s not forget, the shoes always makes the outfit. My current fave is a strappy block heel. The straps scream sex appeal, while the block heel finds a balance so that I don’t look like I’m trying too hard.

Bottom line, find your groove that works for you and rock with it. For me, I always go for effortless sex-appeal. I never want to look like I’ve planned my outfit out days in advance.

Share your sexy-tips with me, let’s chat about it on my Instagram or Facebook Page.

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My Look: Dress – BOOHOO (sold out)

Fighting Anxiety By Being Present

One of the hardest things for me is to let my guard down enough to just … be. I over plan, over analyze, and some times it forces things to spiral out of control. The fact is, I can’t control everything. HD constantly reminds me to “chill”, and surprisingly that’s the toughest thing for me to do.

This year I’ve been intentional with just being present. Little things like, putting my phone away, not recording the moment but instead capturing it in my mind for my own personal memories has really helped. Being present for me means more than just tapping out of social media or work … it’s also about centering myself, finding balance and suppressing my anxiety.

I worry too much, and each day I am constantly battling anxiety. Some people think that anxiety means you’re depressed or you’re sinking in your own crap. It’s not that. For me, I’m anxious … I’m constantly calculating, planning, figuring things out even when I shouldn’t be. A payment that’s not due for two or three months … I’m already panicking over. And even in those little anxious moments, I’ve learned to just clock out and be; and let God provide for me.

The craziest part is, things ALWAYS work out. So I don’t understand why I stress myself out so much behind it. I’ve learned, it’s habit because I’m the planner, coordinator, manager, and doer of my tribe, so I’ve learned to take on these stressful situations by default.

 

Then scripture hits me, ‘Be anxious for nothing, but in everything by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God’

and that’s it. that’s the answer … when adversities come, we’re simply suppose to pray and submit it to God and let him handle it. Because remember … if it’s for us, we will have it if (and only if) it’s according to his will for us.

Xx,

Triena

My 3rd Day Curly Hair Routine With The Doux

Hey guys! So guess what, I’ve found a hair care system that works perfectly with my fine loose curls! The Doux is a hair care system for curly and straight hair. What I love about the product is how fun and full-of-life the system is. From it’s 90s inspired hip hop theme to it’s vibrant scents that leaves your hair feeling and smelling great. Check out this awesome review I did on the products and let be sure to share your thoughts with me.

Although all of their products are phenomenal, my absolutely faves were the Sucka Free Shampoo, the Fresh Rinse Moisturizing Conditioner, and best of all, the Mousse Def Texturizing Foam.

By the way, The Doux can be found at your local Target. If you’re unsure of which target near you carries it, click the link HERE to find out.

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How To Be Confident When You’re Not In Your Comfort Zone

My most frequently asked question is, How am I so confident? The truth is, being confident is a choice, even when I’m not feeling so ‘confident.’ I’ve learned that I can either believe in myself, even when I’m not so sure, or I can fall deep into self-doubt; and that just hurts too much! Here are a few ways I’ve learned to be confident even when it’s out of my comfort zone.

Do Something Different Every Day. In order to see different results, you have to do something different. I learned early on that I had to break routines so that I wouldn’t dwell in my comfort zone because things don’t always go the way we expect them to, and my mental should be able to adjust to that. Whether is a big change like budgeting for a special trip, or a simple change like choosing a new restaurant to try for lunch … it’s change, and your body has to get use to it so that you can easily dwell in uncomfortable settings.

Trust Yourself. Nobody does you quite like you do. That’s literally 90 percent of why I am so confident. Even if I’m in a room with people who are smarter, wealthier, cuter, or more popular than me, I don’t lose my confidence because I know I have something valuable to offer the room … and that’s me. Know your worth, and boldly bask in it.

Think On Your Feet. A part of being confident is being able to think clearly during times of stress. This doesn’t mean you need to be able to belt-out lots of information during intense times; this simply means that you should be able to work well under pressure. Try having conversations with people who are nothing like you. Or interacting with someone you normally wouldn’t share a space with. If you can do those things without feeling anxious, then you’re on your way to building your confidence.

I remember as a little girl, I would spend my summers in Los Angeles with my Cali-Family. My parents would drop me off to the airport, and I would board a plane and fly 6 hours. I was 10 years old traveling 3 thousand miles alone. It was the most uncomfortable thing I’d ever done, but it molded me into being an outgoing, well-traveled, confident little girl. Being a small-town Alabama girl spending summers in LA with a bunch of city girls evolved me, and made me “do something different,” trust myself,” and “think on my feet.”

We have to put ourselves in uncomfortable situations to develop our confidence. Do something out of the ordinary every day, so that you can not only learn who you are –but like who you are.

My 2018 Intentions … Better Late Than Never!

It’s nearly March, and I’m just now getting around to mapping out my intentions for the year. Mesita (my new girlfriend that also happens to be the Bridal Shop Owner that designed my custom wedding dress) shared with me the difference in having intentions versus goals. I’ve learned that intentions are actions that I am working on, while goals are merely a thought. So this year I decided to share my intentions with you all …

  1. Be Present. I’m a planner, so naturally I’m always forward thinking. I tend to over think sometimes which causes me to loses out on living in the moment even if it’s just for a split second. I got a glimpse of living in the moment at my wedding… HD and I really had the time of our lives in 8 hours. And every chance I get to reflect back and relive those moments, I do. I loved the feeling that I felt at my wedding, surrounded by everyone I love and standing in that moment in time. It taught me that every day I need to bask in my present-self.
  2. Save More For Things I Want. Again, another valuable lesson I learned from wedding planning was my ability to save! HD and I planned the wedding of our dreams in less than 12 months, stashing away lump sums of money at a time. It taught me that I could do this more often! It showed me that there are certain things that I can live without (excessive Target spending lol) and that things can get done with prioritizing and being consistent.
  3. Let Go of People Pleasing. This has honestly been my toughest lesson. I’m a people pleaser; I over accommodate and try to meet the needs of everyone I care about. It really takes a toll on me. I always end up getting the short end of the stick, or working too hard to make sure everyone in my camp is good. I’ve learned that, it’s not fair to me. This year I’m intentionally going to work on pleasing myself instead of others.
  4. Increase My Credit. HD and I have real goals –big ones and they require a strong foundation. I’ve learned that a 700+ credit score is more valuable than 200 grand in the bank. So we’re working towards that 700+ score! Wanna join me on this journey? I’m going to start a ‘credit challenge’ in the next few months so please be on the lookout.
  5. Treat Myself. If you know me, you know I work REALLY HARD. Somedays I’m typing away at my computer for my clients for 14 hours straight, while other times I’m traveling between 4 airports in 48 hours. I want to learn to take a breather and treat myself. I deserve that facial, or a nice pedicure. I work hard for it! And this year I’m going to honor myself by going the extra mile to treat myself.

What are some of your intentions for this year?

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